What did the pirate wear on Halloween?

I asked my veteran friend, “What is the first military rank?

Why don`t ducks tell jokes when they fly?

How does a pig print a document?

What do Santa’s elves love to do with cellphones?

What is Beethoven’s favorite fruit?

Why is a Christmas tree a lousy knitter?

Our government just banned the fifth month of the year.

What do you call an acid that bullies?

I invented a new word.